Sunday, 18 September 2005

Talkin' a'cha

For over ten minutes he stood there talking at me. One of those people who has a lot to say and instead of discussing, totally alienates you by telling you that black is black and white is white or vice versa and anything you might say is to be argued against. His body language leans into your comfort space and he is physically in your face.

This man is the soon-to-be ex of a new friend of mine and it is harder to think of two people more unalike. She brought me into their house as her friend, like a cat with a new toy but he has to pounce and drag her toy away from her. I was only dropping her and the kids off back home after a day round mine and she made me a cuppa in the dining room, but he has to insist on barging into the room and our conversation. Even though I had been polite and nice and had already given him some courtesy. Best of all, his opening line was "I'm starting a counselling course this week". Like a six year old proud of his new thing but this guy is in his sixties and under various court orders for his abusive behaviour to his wife and kids. And he is to be a counsellor because he feels he would be really good?!

In the end I drained my hot cuppa as fast as possible and made my exit. He was unbearably close to me as he thanked me and said he enjoyed the discussion. As his wife and I hugged goodbye on the doorstep he stood there leering in a lecherous way saying he had to keep an eye on us two. Completely revolting man who can't keep his mouth shut or have the grace to give his wife any space.


Original Comments:

Mama Mouse said...

UGH! I cannot imagine how people like that THINK their behavior is FINE! Glad you got out of there in a HURRY!

Monday, September 19, 2005 2:01:00 AM

/T/ said...

What a weirdo. I hope for her he will be a really-soon-to-be ex. I hope it won't interfere your friendship with her.

Monday, September 19, 2005 5:46:00 AM

Le laquet said...

"I'm starting a counselling course this week" - yet under court orders for his abusive behaviour to his wife and kids. Jeez people amaze me sometimes! It's all me, me, me!

Thank goodness he is the "soon to be ex" ... but does your poor friend have to carry on living with him?

Monday, September 19, 2005 6:04:00 AM

jane said...

i think he did that all on purpose. to make her feel uncomfortable & to chase you away. he must see his soon-to-be-ex getting some confidence, enough to go thru this divorce & that threatens him.
what a weasel of a man! i have many other choice words, but your blog is nice & these words aren't.
you're a good friend, doris!

Monday, September 19, 2005 6:10:00 AM

Karen said...

He sounds like a right weirdo - Some people are just not nice, Is your friend aware how uncomfortable he makes you feel?

Monday, September 19, 2005 10:18:00 AM

Cheryl said...

It happens to both genders, I've seen it both ways round - the difference being women are so ready to trust, and men are so much bigger and stronger.
Nonetheless, you get one dependant, resentful person attracted to another for their emotional strength, freedom, and friendly nature. They pull out all the stops to appear to be like that person and therefore appear attractive also. Then when the courting is over and they feel 'equal' the weak minded one continues to consolidate their own self image by treading on what they once looked up to. Thats the point where people get treated as possessions.
Counselling courses should do him good. If its not the degree or diploma, but the basic listening skills, then maybe he will learn about himself, learn to hear what he says. If its further on than that then there are case studies, so he will still be in for a learning curve.
Sorry you felt so slimed.

Monday, September 19, 2005 5:44:00 PM

dog1net said...

I've never understood how some people can talk incessantly. Where I work we have an individual that drones on about this and that but never really has much to say about any thing except that he just goes on and on until your ears begin to hurt and your head begins to swell, yet he never notices that you're not trying to listen because he's just too busy talking at you.

As always, I find something worthwhile and interesting to read on your blog.

Saturday, September 24, 2005 4:20:00 AM

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