Friday, 27 January 2006

Tip-toeing through the tu***

This post re-published December 2012


Looking out for sensitivities, being kind and listening, sharing, but most of all having to step through the minefield of feelings. Being careful of not mis-repeating what the next person said and yet having to be the conduit of information between widespread relatives.

Everyone is acknowledging how difficult my role is and yet I am still having stuff shat on me from a height. Either that or they give me space because of course I'm a busy woman. It is either/or.

At some point I am going to write a plea and give it to every family member. Suggesting that we draw a line under the past and find a way forward. Explaining that everyone has a different viewpoint of exactly the same situation and that each could be more compassionate and understanding of the next person's experience or feelings or opinions.

On the other hand, I could get a gun and put one of them out of their misery and leave the rest to get on with it!

LOL I'm OK but sometimes I get a bit upset by people's attitudes.

On the everso exciting side, two of my new found relatives have booked flights to come visit in a couple of months :-)


Carol said...
Yikes! I'd be nervous of two of them coming to visit Not at the same time? Could be explosive.
doris said...
Oh no.... the two that are coming are wonderful and most welcome. It is my other relatives I have concerns about.
Chandira said...
Sounds so very much like my family! My mum and all her idiot stubborn sisters and brothers. I want to bang all their damn heads together and I forget who the 'adults' are.. Though I guess at almost 34 I do qualify now. ;-)
Cheryl said...
doris said...
What a thoroughly ungrateful post of mine. I'm sorry.
Carol said...
Nonsense! You are the least likely person to be labelled 'ungrateful' I can think of!
Pearl said...
Ah, relatives curious folk. Our neighbour came home and found his boisterous sister (whom he had not seen in nearly 7 years) had talked her way into the building and was waiiting for him at the door with her baggage when he got home from work. Surprise few day visit. lol.
Writer Mom said...
The last five years, I've found myself drawn to the quieter family members...both mine, and my husband's side.
I was losing the battle of fitting in. Holidays were excruciating.
I think it started when I overheard an aunt murmuring something under her breath that I was thinking at the exact moment.
Something like, "These people are NUTS!"
I have close bonds with all of the outsiders now, and it's wonderful.
Friends IN the family...very nice.
I'm so happy to hear you're reconnecting with the wonderful ones.
Steve said...
doris said...
What a thoroughly ungrateful post of mine. I'm sorry.

I must disagree with you Doris I cant see you as ungrateful. The way I see it you are just having a bit of a grumble to a group of friends. It isnt malicious or hurtful just a grumble, we all do it and then look back and think oh i shouldnt have moaned about that but it was the right thing to say at the time.
doris said...
Steve Thanks for your philosophy - it helps! :-)

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