Friday, 7 July 2006


Over the last 18 hours I've been searching through all my photographs to find all and any of my girlfriend who will be having her 50th birthday in a few weeks. We have been firm friends since I was 16 and have shared our lives over the years. She lives in Germany so we only meet up maybe annually but we have met up enough to have many memories. I'm going to scan the photos and make a montage or a photo story book. Not quite sure but need to pull my finger out because I'm off to Germany at the end of the month to surprise her. She has no idea I am coming over for her birthday!

In amongst my boxes of memories are some cringemaking stuff I wonder what to do with. For instance, the love notes I wrote over many years to the man I thought I would always love. Sentiments such as "forever" seem so hollow when re-read after the passage of time and events. I haven't time to deal with them now and just stuffed them back where they were. It somehow feels disloyal to Mr Doris to have them but on the other hand these are about the father of one of my kids.

And then there is the newspaper clipping which makes me chuckle. Along with a number of other "leading women" (because of the job I was doing at the time) we were asked to give our views on a section of society. Mine was politics. At this point anyone who knows me now would laugh and splutter that I should be spouting views on politics. Of course I have them and always have but again, the course of time and having children and losing confidence has taken its toll. But I was there spouting politics.

I love that old chestnut the media use when they want to interview someone.... the interviewee who has been dragged out from somewhere so that the media can illustrate their point, suddenly becomes a "leading person in the field" or a "top person" and the such like.

But I digress. It has been lovely looking through the photos. Finding the one of me at the airport at the age of 12 just before boarding the plane on my own to fly across the world. I suddenly remembered that I was careful about the look on my face. That I shouldn't look too excited and must look like I was sad to be leaving my parents. I was terribly sad to be leaving my beloved little sis but heck, apart from that I was thrilled. It is quite funny because I have a muted smile in that pic which is unusual for me because throughout the years I have grinned in my pics almost no matter what was going on. Oooo I sound like a cold and manipulative person but you have to be sometimes to survive.

Original Comments:

Chandira said...

LOL... Looking through old photos is fun! I burned most of my other stuff before moving to the States, but I have years of old diaries, back as far as about 12 years, with all sorts of stupid stuff about old boyfriends! It is cringemaking.. But, it shows you far you've grown.

Yes, thanks, feeling better today, and less delerious. At least you can't spread colds on the internet! Everybody else is avoiding me. ;-)

Friday, July 07, 2006 10:20:00 PM

Annie said...

I've been looking at old photos recently, what with the move and all that. I've looked wistfully at my sons' baby photos, and wished that I could have them back as little blonde smiling babies.
I've looked through wedding photos with a lump in my throat, and wondered how I got from that pretty, promising twenty-two year old to where and who I am today.
I've looked at photos of my ex with my boys and offered them to the boys, trying to explain that it's not because I don't want them, but because they might want them in the future.
I've looked at photos of old friends, and felt sad seeing the ones who have dumped me because I 'abandoned' my kids. It's such a bittersweet thing to do looking through old photos. I'm just glad that I didn't keep my old diaries as well!

Saturday, July 08, 2006 5:04:00 PM

golfwidow said...

Loved the title of your blog but now I'm liking the content even better than that.

Saturday, July 08, 2006 9:30:00 PM

Jo said...

I know what you mean Doris :-) old pictures can be so evocative. They never grow old, they have a power to put you right back somewhere instantly.

What's this nonsense about not believing you could be a 'leading woman' spouting about politics etc?!! You are completely believable hon...your ideas and opinions here are always extremely thoughtful and perceptive.

Have confidence Doris! ;-) For all I know, you might actually be the Under Secretary of State for Work and Pensions!

(PS You're not are you?!)

Sunday, July 09, 2006 1:04:00 AM

Carol said...

Well she knows now, doesn't she? :))

Sunday, July 09, 2006 5:18:00 PM

doris said...

Chandira Yes, it certainly is an indicator of the miles travelled and the ways we have grown. Summer colds are ick, glad you are feeling a bit better.

Annie Ahh for those baby pics of our little treasures as cute ones.

Golfwidow Cooo, thanks!

Jo ROFL - Under Secretary of State for Work and Pensions more like under the Secretary of State for Work and Pensions. (Quick I better rush off and find out if that person is male or female and decide how provocative I wish to be!)

Carol Nah! I don't write such things about someone who reads here.... I have another friend or two in Germany. Strange how one country can end up featuring again and again in a person's life.

Sunday, July 09, 2006 11:00:00 PM

Anji said...

What a fascinating memory lane you've got. I think I would have been careful of the expression on my face at 12 years old too, if I'd had to part from my family. My diaries aren't half as interesting, but I could tell you what I had on my sandwiches 30 years ago today, if you like!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006 9:47:00 AM

doris said...

Go on then Anji - what DID you have on your sandwiches 30 years ago today?!

Sandwich fillings are a whole subject in itself. I can reciprocate and tell you what I had day in and day out!

I love reading through the "boring" details of Mr Doris' boyhood diaries. About his paper delivery jobs, the weather, what he did at school and sometimes what he had for dinner! Tinned peaches were big and a delicacy back in the 70s! ;-)

Tuesday, July 11, 2006 10:52:00 AM

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